As I drive down the side roads near my home, I find myself in a sort of calm sadness. We are closer and closer to our move date, and I feel a bittersweet excitement. In a few short weeks I will be jobless, having applied to a few places but only to have them say to apply once I am in country. I understand their need for me to actually be in country, but I would rather have a guaranteed job rather than heading their without my own source of income. I have never felt so vulnerable…until now.
The idea that all I will have is my husband and the girls is a SCARY thing for a woman like me. A woman who has never known what it feels like to be a “stay at home”. Ali suggested that I take the time to just go to school…but I can not just let me career go…it is not that easy. We do not have children, just dogs. As the days get closer to us moving I am starting to feel like a cornered animal. I am running out of options. So many people are telling me it is difficult to find a job on the island….GREAT.
Just let go and let God Lahaina….LET GO AND LET GOD.